| | so whilst my motivation is lost with procrastination, i decided nows a good time to drop a quick xanga entry....besides it seems that this has become a religious thing anyway....updating xanga when i should be better off studying..hmm... havent been up to much these days, prolly been on FB too much for my own good, digging out olddddddddd photos from my photo collection and cant help but laugh and miss the old times...getting out of work has been awesome tho....have really treated this like a mini holiday (minus the fun part) doing a lottttttttttttt of reading (which is sth i dont particularly enjoy)...so much reading that i think my eyes are going to bleed soon HAHAHA other than that, i consider my lifestyle to be relatively disciplined...so disciplined that i feel im starting to become a tad antisocial....havent really stepped out the house to do anything, see anyone whatsoever....whats even scarier is that even when pplz call/talk to me, i dont even feel like talking back....think ive completely gone into shutdown mode =.=" not sure whether its a good/bad thing, but ive quite enjoyed this personal time and space...that said, there are ofcoz those times i feel so incredibly lonely and frustrated...and dislike these stupid restrictions ive imposed on myself....i'll get over it tho, eventually. anywayz off with that...dad reminded me its my bday soon...yes..i know >< makes me think, damn wheres my year gone? what have i done with my life? can i not grow up? in fact, can i turn back time...back to primary school days when my grandparents were with me, when i was more naive, when i had not a worry in the world, when i was just genuinely happier, simply because??? now i know we cant change anything from the past, but we can control our future...but realistically, is it possible? why cant we prevent unhappy things from happening? seeing that we can choose how we lead our life, why is it that we still find ourselves being discontent with what we have now? why does it seem that there is always going to be something missing....really makes me wonder, will we ever be blissfully happy? |
| | Posted 10/26/2009 12:59 AM - 5 Views
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